What I don’t want you to know

by Starla J. King on February 7, 2013

sjk_restless1There are times I really don’t enjoy writing.

Sometimes all my creative preparations and coaxings don’t do diddley-squat.

I fall victim of “keyboard stutter”  (type type erase erase type erase type erase type erase erase) more often than not.

I don’t always buy into the conventional wisdom that the only way to write well is to write daily, no matter what (and yes, I’ve written blog posts about the importance of that.  which i still believe.  just not always).

At times, I purposefully ignore the rules of punctuation and use questionable grammar — publicly (don’t look, Mom!).  Because I can.  And because I get weary of watching myself so closely.

Sometimes I believe that the best thing we can do for our writing is to not write.  Yet I worry that if I don’t write today, that means I will never write again.

Some days I need to know myself as a person, not a writer.

Other days nothing matters if I can’t be a writer.

At times, being a “creative” feels a lot less like magic and a lot more like angst, restlessness, and back-to-back meaning crises (crisises? criseece? crisii?).

And I’m writing a blog post about what I DON’T want to write about because I can’t figure out what I DO want to write about.

Well damn if I didn’t just trick myself into writing once again.

 

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Michelle February 7, 2013 at 12:05 pm

Simply beautiful in its honesty. I have the same issues with a bucket-full of shoulds … I should create something today … I should followup with that client … I should blah blah blah … so thank you dear friend for shining a light on how powerful it is to just say YES to one’s heart.

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Starla J. King February 7, 2013 at 12:24 pm

Yes, Michelle… YES!

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Eli February 7, 2013 at 1:34 pm

If it was easy all the time and something you didn’t have to work out then HOW ON EARTH would you be able to share your wisdom with us?
I love that you admit this. Makes me admitting my hating to run and taking my breaks from it okay. I’ve also found that I come back with renewed vigor and strength when I ease off a day or two.
One simple thought is when you don’t want to write–back away from the electronics and go old school. Pull out a piece of construction paper and a crayon. Write like a kid.

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Starla J. King February 7, 2013 at 3:40 pm

Beautifully said, Eli! Yes, there’s all sorts of re-energizing after a “back off” isn’t there??

I do find various forms of non-electronic coloring to be fabulous. Time to try the same with writing!

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