A Taste of Freedom

by Starla J. King on May 21, 2014

I can’t say I’ve truly known oppression, yet today I know the deep sigh of freedom that comes when limits are removed, opportunities are offered, and the distinction between “them” and “us” wavers.

Today, unlike the past 45 years of my life, I can choose to legally marry the love of my life — in my own state of Pennsylvaniaeven though she’s a she.

I didn’t expect it to mean this much, the option to have a piece of paper with a few key signatures to affirm that yes, indeed, these two women who have acted married for 17 years really mean it this time.

Because, you see, we meant it when we got engaged in the coffee aisle of Service Stationers and bought the diamond rings.

We meant it when with vows and matching sapphire rings we committed (at sunset, on the beach) to being, living, loving, and learning together for the rest of our lives.

We meant it when we bought the first house as joint tenants with rights of survivorship… and did the same again for the next house.

We meant it when our first (well, ok, maybe second) concern with my You Have Cancer diagnosis was to make sure that all medical personnel understood that this woman whose rings matched mine was to have complete authority over any necessary medical decisions on my behalf.

But no matter how real it’s felt to us for all these years, I now know that the opportunity for legal recognition of our place in each other’s lives is an additional thrill, a gift, a dream come tr… well, not even a dream come true because honestly I never dared dream of this.

S&S_PhotoBooth1So will we marry?

Will we dance our way to City Hall for a shiny new Marriage License and start a WEDDING folder in our browser bookmarks and, most importantly, start the conversation about wedding cake?

Guess you’ll have to wait and see. 🙂

Update June 14, 2014: The answer is…
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For more information about the history of gay marriage in PA (and elsewhere), see here.

For more of my story about being a lesbian Mennonite, see my Anatomy of Love series.

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